So, who is to say that it is always in the best interest of the child to have the father in their lives? In my case, the father of my two boys is an alcoholic and a drug addict. I've never kept my boys from him. He has no rights to visitation however, when my boys go to stay with their grandfather, their father sees them. I am aware and don't have an issue with it. For the safety of my children, the visits he has is supervised. In the 5 years that we have been divorced he has made 1 child support payment. He is $90,000 behind. That's right, ninety thousand dollars. Raising 2 children alone isn't easy and it isn't cheap. My boys have had to miss out on a lot of things because their father refused to HELP support them. His comment is I'm not going to pay to see my kids. It isn't about that. It is about you making sure your children have what they need. You helped make them, help take care of them. The child support that you should pay is to make sure your children have a roof over their head, food to eat, clothes & shoes that fit, among other things. It isn't to pay the mother so she will let you see the kids. If it is being used as a bargaining tool, that is wrong. Point is....TAKE CARE OF YOUR KIDS!!
Mar 28, 2009 Rating
LIKE OR NOT by: bamswphd
BAD RELATIONSHIP WITH THE MOTHER OR NOT. HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE SUPPORT OF THOSE CHILDREN. ALTHOUGH I KNOW THAT A MANS THOUGHT PATTERNS ARE TOTALLY DIFFERENT FROM THAT OF A WOMEN. But a man should know i have to do what i have to do period end. and if he cant deal with the confrontation from the custodial parent then go to court and get an order of visitation with certain stipulations. And there is no confrontation to wage garnishment or writting a check out to the courts to issue the money to these boys. That is a poor excuse unless you have not recieved word of the death of your child you know they are still alive thus obligating you to support that child. Its not a matter of i dont like your mother of father.
Men need to get out of the mind frame that they can just walk away.
Mar 28, 2009 Rating
Info in your case by: Anonymous
Alabama is one of the worst states for helping to collect payments from parents who do not pay.The program is merely set up to keep welfare coming into the state, all though you get an order for support alabama does not enforce it. You have to find your own lawyer which in some cases is not possible. Try getting a lawyer that will get paid from what they collect, especially since the amount is so much. there are programs of course for a fee such as support kids.com But i would encourage you to DEAL WITH THE TERRIBLE SERVICES Alabama state offers. Call daily if you have to go up there ask for a supervisor! they dont care about you. because there are thousands of cases but call and be assertive Dont back down. SEND letters etc if all else fails go apply for welfare of some sort that way it will be on the desk of someone right away no im not saying use the welfare system but i know that those cases are worked a littile faster than those of who appear to be able to afford it which is so sad. My biggest advice is to get a lawyer because they have routes that can be taken to go directly into the chambers with the judge and to talk with the state directly and it usually cuts your time in half. been there done that. im sorry that you are having to deal with this keep your cool and communicate with your kids Just do the best you can! because god has a special place for those who do not care for their children.
Feb 18, 2009 Rating
Alabama Dead Beat Dad by: Anonymous
Is he really a Dead Beat, or did you force him into it? When their father did come to see the kids, which I assume he did in the beginning, did you nag him, or give him a hard time? Was he allowed to pick up his children without having to fight with you? Did you freely give him his visitation rights, and let yourself drift to the background for your children's sake? If you nagged him, or fought with him, or gave him a hard time, it's no wonder he didn't come back around! It's usually not that a non-custodial parent doesn't love or want to be around their kids, it's because of what they have to contend with when they DO pick up their kids.If both parents truly love their children, and want the best, FORGET THE MONEY! and try boosting the relationship for the children's sake. Of course, we divorced mothers with custody NEED the money (I certainly did!) but the most important issue if the well being of the kids, and to try to keep the relationship with both parents strong.
Jan 29, 2009 Rating
Child Support by: Anonymous
If you have an order for child support through the court, you can go to your courthouse in your county and fill out a form to petition the court. It costs $33.00 here in my county. You can represent yourself. They will give you a hearing within a month or two in my county. THe judge will order him to pay. They can put him in jail if he does'nt.
