Can You Federally Sue a Child Support Office?!

by M
(California)

I'm not one to sue but i'm tired of being lied to. Here's my story, and my frustration. I was married to someone who was not an American citizen but a European. He was educated and was hired as a consultant on projects here in the U.S.. When we met I had just come out of a long illness and surgeries, so he knew I had medical problems but I also had money. When my daughter was born he didn't want children and abuse started so I went out on my own. He cleared out my bank acccounts etc., and the house that I owned signed my name and sold. Got rid of my car and left me with the shirt on my back and pregnant. I brushed myself off and did what I had to do.

He wasn't a U.S. citizen so child support was based on no income at $150 a month. I knew he was making good money but I couldn't find proof at the time. My child was born autistic, I needed help so I moved near family. I never collected or asked about child support. After a number of years my money ran out and my medical and her we in the thousands. Doctor's said they would no longer allow me to work and would never give me clearance to work. But I found things to do in the home and we were fine. Then both she and I became really ill about four years ago. I had to go onto disability and AFDC for her for a couple of months.

I had also what states call "good cause" and no one did anything about child support. Then I was told that I had no choice he didn't live in the same state etc., the state of California was going to go after child support. When I got a lump sum from disability, the government took their cut for monies given to us during that time. Then we were on our own for awhile not needing help. But things got complicated with health and again I needed assistance. AFDC would not allow me to be in their work program even though I wrote a work plan etc., they said if I got complications it was on them. They went after my ex not only for the money that they gave me at that time but for 10 years of back child support. Come to find out he was working in the U.S. making great money, bought a house and was having fun traveling and doing his thing. He blamed me for them going after child support. They then did a modification and the order went to $2,500 a month.

After a year he quit that job. Did I see a penny, no states go after fathers, so that they get their money back. Children and mothers in most states never see a dime. Plus they can go after a father for half of any medical expenses if the child is not on SSI. What is strange is that a child can get SSI and 80% of the child support order on top of that. What happens is that these modifications are done without me being able to participate, or tell my side. The system is keeping us poor and sick. Now the state is putting pressure for my daughter to have special treatments, in home care etc., who will pay for that they will go after him. I think the system stinks. It breaks fathers and mothers. I was refused medical for my daughter because they said her father has insurance for her but they didn't know who the provider was. Four years, yes four years with visits to the Child Support agency and letter to the other state.

Then I got slapped with a letter saying that if I get any state aid only the state we reside in can contact the state in which the original order is drawn upon, because he's working there. But do I get the paper work, can they even find my letters and request to them or from the other state. Or the other state sends me letters to them which must be done by law, but it takes 7 days to get here and another 7 to 10 for the snail mail to reach me sometimes longer and then the letter is outdated and I have not given them the material they are asking for or I have one day. I was thinking if I nailed myself upon a cross outside the Child Support Office would I get their attention. I'd like to know what they are doing in "my name" for their benefit?! Parents beware it's in you best interest to work things out, and oh by the way you cannot close a case in another state if any party owe money. What a mess this system is can't a class action suit take place?