Child Support laws need a SERIOUS review!
My husband pays support on two different cases (for two children who have different mothers). He is involved in the life of one of them, but chose not to be involved with the other due to the lack of relationship with the mother and the fact that she broadcasted to everyone that all she wanted to do was have a baby and didn't need to be in a relationship with the father. So out of carelessness and stupidity, she ended up getting pregnant. THIS is the one we have problems with. We have paid the county over 9,000.00, most of it in one lump sum because they levied our bank account and took it, leaving us and the children we have together with absolutely NOTHING. All of our savings, all of the money that was to support the children in our home was gone.
Within the past 2 years or so (the child in the case is about 2 by now) since they took the money from our account, payments have been made and yet they keep saying he is still behind on support and on what he owes to the state. It's interesting how medical costs from the pregnancy and confinement 2 years ago, still have yet to be paid. They take extra money out of his check that supposedly goes towards what is owed from the past 2 years and not one of the amounts have budged! On top of that, they take tax returns every year! Which in turn means that, NO, there shouldn't still be back owed support and there shouldn't be anything that is still owed to the state! But they keep piling on the costs and fees and what they say is owed which in turn means that my husband sooner or later could have a bench warrant out and be put in jail all because he can't keep up with the counties bull****!
And all for a child that he is not and does not want to be involved with? I think child support laws take advantage of the non-custodial parent (usually the father), all it is is a meal ticket. There are some women, like the one in this case, who wait and wait for the weekly check because they "need" it, but yet they have a live-in boyfriend or husband who works and pays the bills and at the same time they collect assistance from the state.
Meanwhile, my husband has to pay back the state because this mother and new father to the child are all on welfare when they don't need to be because they're perfectly capable of supporting themselves. And yes, I support my husband in his decision not to be involved in the child's life. I was a single mother myself for over 6 years and decided that I was not going to force my child's father to take care of her. If he didn't want to, that was fine with me.
I supported her on my own until I got remarried. I wish I knew a way to go about trying to get things changed when it comes to support. My whole outlook on the situation is, a woman can have a baby and leave it at a hospital without any explanation ... she can give her baby up for adoption, give everyone a sob story about how she's not able to take care of it, and she gets PRAISED for giving another family a chance to adopt the baby?! For one, if a father doesn't have the right to give up custody of a child and is FORCED by the state to pay and pay and pay, then a mother shouldn't have the right to give up custody of a child either.
Women can give their children away all day and get away scott free with no responsibility to pay support to a family that adopts their child. Yes, it takes two to make a baby ... there's that old saying. But it's ultimately the woman's decision on whether or not she has the baby. If a woman is not with the father when she is pregnant and when she has the baby, that was her decision to do it on her own ... so take care of it on your own. Instead, they go after the man for everything he has and DOESN'T have for that matter, and they make him pay in any way they can whether it be money, jail time, taking away licenses, etc.
What about his decision in all of it? He wasn't asked if he wanted the baby or not. But because the woman wanted the baby, he is forced into it ... had SHE have not wanted the baby, SHE wouldn't have been forced into taking care of it. Women, even men, who collect child support should have to be reviewed every so often. They review a case and make sure that the man is paying their support, they review it to see if they need show cause, or to see if they need to put out a bench warrant ... why do they not review it and make sure the mother is putting that money towards the child. Review it and see if the mother even needs the money.
Half the time, the non-custodial parent needs the money more than the custodial parent! Especially when you're on state assistance, it does not take that much to take care of a child ... single mothers end up getting everything paid for by the state. They can't take into account that the parent has to pay rent or mortgage, or that they need gas in their car or they have to make a car payment ............ they would need to do that whether they had the child or not! So a lot of single mothers/single fathers get medical paid for by medicaid and get free food through the state some even get cash assistance ... that really doesn't leave much left to when it comes to taking care of a child ... extra money to clothe them. Oh, the child support pays that so the custodial parent doesn't have to worry about forking over any money for that either. I just think there is a lot more responsibility being put on the non-custodial parent because all in all most people look down on the non-custodial parent and treat them like they're a deadbeat .............. it's ridiculous
