Dealing with crazy baby mama
Ten years ago I was in a relationship with a woman I considered myself to be in love with. I asked her to marry me and while we were engaged she got pregnant.
Now let me preference this by saying that she had one child when we met as did I. I had explicitly explained to her that we could not afford another child at that time and that we needed to pool our money together to get our own place as she was living with her parents at the time. Well I learned that she was not the one for me and broke off the engagement.
Shortly thereafter when my son was born I decided that maybe we could make it work as I didn't want to have another child out of wedlock. So we got engaged a second time but still we couldn't make it work so I moved on. Years later after I had found someone new she decided that she wanted to get back together but at that point it was too late. When she found out I was getting married - my child is now five - she went to the courts to file child support.
Even though I was giving her money and trying to see my son when she wasn't being difficult. Now we are going back and forth in child support court because they are trying to make me pay more than I can afford. I make my payments on time and they still garnished my wages and suspended my license without my knowledge. I drive for a living, if I had gotten arrested for a suspended license I would have lost my job and no one would have gotten child support. But still I have to pay for the incompetence of our child support system but yet I get no visitation with my son. She is contesting legitimation because she doesn't want me to have any rights.
I feel that the law should state unless a woman is willing to not contest to legitimation and visitation that she deserves no child support. So now I am paying a woman that purposely quit her job so that I can support her and her three children which only one is mine. But I don't get to help raise my son and he wonders why his daddy won't come and see him. The laws are crazy. They are not in the best interest of the child. I think us non-custodial parents should ban together and change the laws. Whose with me?
Trey's Thoughts: When trying to work things out with a woman who does not want to be with you can be hurtful and hard, especially if you both have a child together. I was very young when I had my son and did not know the system as well as I do now. Learning how the child support system works can work to your advantage if you know what to look for.