I just want to pay my child support in peace

by kfactor239
(Greensboro, NC)

I have been divorced now for 3 years. I lived in Florida and me and my ex had joint custody. I had the boys (3) half the week then she had them half the week. I worked for an airline as a maintenance controller making 50000 a year and she worked as a legal sectetary for 80000 a year plus bonuses. There was no childsupport agreement.


Well the airline I worked for went out of buisness and I was forced to take a job in North Carolina. She remained in Florida and I told her that we needed to get something on paper for support. She finally got a settelment agreement together when I decided to go bankrupt because I could not affort all the bills I had taken over from the divorce. She now (6 months after the divorce) had married a man that was in the army and stationed in Savannah Ga.

So she wanted to be able to move the kids out of state so all of a sudden she got a settlement agreement together. I was called at work by her lawyer telling me that if I didnt sign the agreement that he would make my life hell. I didnt have the money to get a lawyer so I just signed the agreement. I paid the support directly out of my check into her bank account and everything worked fine until last Apr. In Mar of 09 I was laid off from my job. I called her and told her that there was no way I would be able to pay support on unemployment and she agreed that that was fine that I would just start paying again whenever I could.

I was laid off till Oct. I moved to Memphis for a new job and paid for Nov and Dec. Just before christmas I get this letter from the Missouri state child support enforcement (she moved to Missouri oh yeah 14hours away from NC just great!!) that I owe 6000 in back childsupport. Alright whatever I guess I will pay it back as best I can. I then got a call back from my old job in North Carolina that they wanted me to come back so I did (it was more money). So now Im back in NC. I dont have an issue with paying back childsupport that isnt the problem its just unfortunate that I had to go through all this due to the economy.

My issue is that I never agreed to pay any state any money! I have no order to pay anyone other than my ex wife. They sent me this hate letter telling me they are going to take all my tax refunds and not allow me to even leave the country. I also read that they can revoke my FAA license which is my livelihood. Im sorry but paying out 1000 a month when all unemployment pays is 500 a week is impossible add on rent 650, electric 100, phone 70, insurance 50, gas 40, that leaves me 50 dollars a month to eat with. And she lost her job when she left Florida my children were being supported by my exwifes husband whos in the army because she wont get a job. I supported her and all three of my sons for tweleve years of marriage all by myself. This one bad spell I have been through and now Im the bad guy. It just makes me sick.

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I just want to pay my child support in peace and live my life in peace and happiness
by: Anonymous

I can tell you hiring a lawyer still does not help you. I recently made the post about how my child support kept getting amounts added to it month by month. it has now been longer than 4 months that I have been monitoring my child support. let me give you an up date on my situation. In January I was doing normal everyday shopping at my local mall when I saw a boothe at this boothe sat job recruiters I thought it couldn't hurt since I've struggled with jobs over the past two years. I sat down and talked with them and was immediately satisfied interested, after a long conversation I setup an in office consultation with the job specialist on a later date. I went to the consultation and was overly excited to find that this speciallist informed me there are jobs out there that not only better your life but will provide you with the chance to catch your child support up quickly. correctional officers if you pass the intial test and become employed they garnish you entire pay until you are caught up on your arrears on child support. I applied and passed the first intial test. the custodial parent found out and filed enforcement on the back child support. when we spoke about this incident the custodial parent simply stated that he had researched my potential job offer and saw that if I have pending charges then I could not work for the job. I asked why would he do that knowing that he would not only recieve $2,319 a month until I am caught up but that I would be caught up very quickly his reply was that I didn't deserve to have a job like this that he felt I shouldn't be allowed anything. I discussed this with my lawyer and he said if I had no proof he said it, it could not be admissable in court, it would be my word against his with no proof. I go to court on March 15th. The custodial parents have power backed by the legal system and it's sad to say but regardless of what we try to do we will always be screwed until the children are grown and even then I can't say that the battle will truely end. I honestly believe that unless every noncustodial parent in the world stands up petitions to have the legal system change we are all continue to be prosecuted, jailed, fees adding up, life stripped of all peace, all constitional rights and of right to proper legal justice. Our children are nothing more than potential dollar signs to the custodial parents and legal system.

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back suppot question...please answer
by: Anonymous

If you are behind on child support...and there no way to pay the full amount when going to court...ever...will the cycle continue of going to jail...getting out then go back until you can pay the full amount or is there any kind of payment plan that can be set up to pay back support without going through this vicious cycle? How can someone pay the back support if thay are in jail,and cannot work????

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Child Support
by: Anonymous

the only way you truely might be able to change this hell bound cycle the child support system has created is to research and study it and find out how to get petitions ect... to get the laws changed. I would sign and support changing the laws and I'm sure there are thousands out there that would to.

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Child Support
by: Anonymous

I'm a noncustodial parent as the child support legal system puts and I pay in child support every month, I am also behind, but have come to realize that no matter what you do once you get behind the system makes for damn sure they keep you behind. I have been watching my child support on their online system for 4 months now I go in and check it once a week and every month for these past for months the payments keeps going back up at the start of the new month. ok example: Novemeber I was in the good come December the 1st. It showed my back added $266.80 to it. Come January 1st it showed my back added $195.20 to it. unless you pay the full amount off all at once they are gonna keep adding to it each month and the sad part is they know if we had money to get a lawyer to contast it then we wouldn't be behind in the first place. they don't take into consideration what you're current situation is and really don't care at all. I;m remarried and have children with my current husband and have struggled on and off with the job processes for 2 years now lay offs are not something you have control over I was just recently laid off from the school district because of the new changes in the law thanks to our president. but if you go to jail that doesn't help either because being in jail doesn't pay your child support in fact it gets you even more behind and then hampers you're ability even more to get a job because you now have a arrest record. they want to keep in you in a financial whole. for one that's more money they can get for free from you and call it interest fees or interest due and if you do go to jail then they get even more money for that because of state funding they request to provide food shelter ect... while you're in jail, and if you do go to court repeatedly to fight your case and try and keep your freedom then guess who pays for all those fees we do. I've been fighting this battle off and on for 10 years now and I don't see an end.

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No Concessions
by: Anonymous

I agree with the last post. The system will eventually fail you no matter how many concessions you make. After many such concessions and getting dragged back to court, I have learned, it's better to get screwed without giving in to concessions than it is to manipulated into believing that this is the last you'll hear. It's never over, because the female's dispositions and prerogatives don't stop changing. They can say its for this or for that, but don't put yourself in constant jeopardy to "stay out of court", etc. The state gets federal subsidies for every dollar they collect. This goes toward hiring people who work on commission to review any cases where they think they can get more money, and trust me, they don't get commission on downward modified orders...

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yeah..
by: Anonymous

you would be in a better situation if you got a lawyer...with these type of things you really need one. i know you dont have money but maybe you can borrow or go on consignment with a laywer?

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