If you weren't married you have no rights

by jb
(ny)

My 10 year old is being adopted by my ex's sister because my ex cannot mentally raise my child. I have paid every dollar in child support, and stayed away because I thought it was in the best interest of my child. This was what my ex wanted. My mother was able to keep somewhat of a correspondence relationship open with my ex. Ex threatened to take that away from her if I was involved.

About a month ago I received a call from a man in Iowa, (I live in NY). He says he has my child for the past 9 months, and that the mother signed away her rights. And that he was going to adopt her because I have neglected her. He say he doesn't needs me to sign the papers because I am not in the child's life. I have done everything humanly possible outside of hiring a PI to find them. Every family member is unlisted. I have spoken to at least 4 lawyers and my attempt was for visitation, which should not be denied as I am the father and current with child support.

Wrong! A judge can deny me because having never been married to my ex I have no rights, other than being a sperm donor who gets to pay for a child he cannot see. What's worse, is that my child cannot read! I'm not looking to bash states, but here in NY that would've never been the case. Education, culture, the ocean, Manhattan? I am more evolved than the simple minded people who have and will be raising her. I was told by the potential adoptive parents that I could not send a gift to my chld for her birthday, because their children weren't receiving anything. Unbelievable!

And that waste of a life, should have been an aborton EX still get get to collect child support!!! My child doesn't get the money. If there were justice I could bring her up on fraud.

So what happens when THEIR child is addicted to chrystal meth, pregnant, and a high school dropout? Not my problem. There is no silver lining.

And those Father's advocacy groups are bullshit! They just take your money. They filled my times sensitive documents in the wrong county! They prey on that fact that you are desperate and can't afford a lawyer, when in actuality the lawyer will cost less.

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