Im begging for any advice for my son

by Help us Please
(Columbus Ohio)

I am currently trying to get custody of my soon to be 6 this month,year old son.He has a lot of mental issues caused by his mother.For instance,he is not potty trained for fear of her hitting him or screaming at him,and this has caused him to hold it for an entire week before he see's me so he can go to the bathroom without getting beaten or scream at.


It's so bad I have been videoing him and in one weekend he went a total of 96 times,yes 96 times.And I was told I would be in contempt of court if I took him to see a doctor for help.His mother claims he is potty trained and the Guardian ad litem in the case believes this,even though he has seen my videos,I guess he thinks this is normal behavior for a 5 year old boy.My son struggles so hard to try to go to the bathroom and he cries and says things like "Daddy can you fix it daddy,please daddy can you make the poop juice stop".

That tears my heart out,because his mother is flooding him with Miralax to force him to go and now he can't control it any longer,which will lead to a lifetime of torment from other children,I am terrified of this.My sons mom also told the Guardian that he was potty trained and I have atleast a hundred videos showing he isn't and yet the Guardian does nothing even though she lied directly to him,but if it were me,he would hold me in contempt.

My son is still in daycare because his mother says he was not ready for school when the reality of it was she has not gotten him potty trained.It gets worse,on the days he knows I'm coming to get him at daycare,he cries from the moment he's dropped off until the moment I pick him up.Now I am off on Thursday and Friday,but the Guardian ad Litem says I must take him to the daycare from 8:30 am until 5:45 pm on both days because he needs to develop his social skills for school,my son had been going to this daycare for 3 plus years,he is more than prepared for school and if he is not,then what sort of miracle can they preform in 3 months to get him ready.Don't you think he would have great social skills after 3 years ? Well he does and when I asked the Guardian about,telling him he had great skills already,he would not answer me.

Oh,did I mention my sons mother does not have to take him to daycare on her day off on Wednesday,but I do and if I don't that I will be held in contempt of court.And I don't even have summers with my son,because the same guardian told me at my first hearing that I was getting the best deal I could get when I got my son from Thursday to Sunday and failed to even mention rule 21 I think it is and I was stripped of my summer time with my son.

He thinks its best for my child to sit in a daycare from 8:30 am to 5:45 pm rather than to spend time with his father,what sense does that make? I have never been in trouble in my life,I pay 225 a week in child support,I love my son more than anything in the world,so why am I being treated so unfairly?My son cries and tells me "Daddy I'm so sorry,I'm so sorry daddy" when I take him back to his mother,my heart breaks daily.My son says things like "I wish I could freeze mommy into ice then smash her","Daddy we need to make a robot wasp and it can sting mommy,then we can put her in a cage and I can stay with you forever","Daddy I wish I was 52 feet tall so I could squish mommy".All these things tell me he is terrified of her because she is so violent and mean to him.With all the video evidence I have does anyone know why this Guardian is turning a blind eye and refuses to help me at all ? Can anyone out PLEASE tell me what I can do about this Guardian ad Litem,who can I complain to about him ? I am BEGGING anyone for some sort of advice before my poor little boy is scared for life.My email address is elij2306@hotmail.com.

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Hang in there
by: Anonymous

In most states you may ask to change Guardian ad litem's and judges at least one time. Do your research before hand and find out who the sympathtic ones have been in your type of case.

get a psychiatrist involved immediately. Not a psychologist but a psychiatrist take your child to counseling regularly on your parenting time,if you have to and you go as well. The Guardiam Ad litem's usually never object to that. And one last thing we had to ask for a full psychological evaluation on my EX wife due to her personality disorder Dx. It worked. We did get more parenting time, not full custody but more time. Things got alittle better they will never go away but at least better. The girls are now 15 and 17 so they speak alittle for themselves. Hand in there.

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NOT alone
by: Anonymous

Many fathers are facing similar dilemas so first realize their is help out their but it requires your time and involvment I don't understand the guardian litem thing your refering to but when i went to court the first time I was told I was lucky to have 30/70 custody by the judge and by other people wednesdays and every other weekend what kind of crap is that anyways it was extremly hard to deal with but now 4 5 years later it gets a little easier i fought I'm not rich but found a parenting group which the self help center should be able to help you find try to find one which sympathsizes with fathers and pay to join it cost me 160 and classes for 6 months with that i was given the support and resources to after 3 years win 50/50 custody you will never have full custody the ideal is joint custody and having to deal with irresponisble parties is hard but gets easier with time, i see nothing wrong with taking child in for check ups regardless of what other parties say if your concerned then do it it's not abnormal to be concerned and if the child not getting the proper care then as a parent you are obligated to do so, Miralax my child has same problem not to your extreme now 9 and still takes medicine and from time to time she complains that it hurts when she goes the doctor suggests one have a set time when they have to stay in potty for ten twenty minutes and try. Don't waiver same time everyday so help understand this is time another make sure there taking proper amount little extra if complaing but not excess, and yes stress can cause the child to not want to poop so your goal is to lessen her stress as much as you can understand unfornutaly you can only control your custody time so do the best to care for him and step in when health or happiness is concern, school issue they do need to go to school i know when you dont see them very often its our nature to spend as much time as possible but the child does need to get social interaction just make the time before and after the best u can, i fought for custody three years later i have half custody which is the best you'll get unless she's on crack so get used to that part but wwith 50/50 you have rights to their schooling their heatlh care etc., their choices, it is possible don't give up and when you lose in court you go back for modification until things are fair you with time can learn the system file your own paperworks for modification etc. another tip mediation is extremly important never lose your temper regardless of the other parties allegations and lies you lose with mediator you lose child good luckjonepling@yahoo.com

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