In the whole off the get go
by Matthew M.
I have two children one 17 one now 14 from two different mothers. My daughter (my first child) her mother and I have worked together since the get go on child support and keeping it reasonable and giving me visitation whenever I want to see my daughter.
My son on the other hand his mother played me like a fiddle. WE spent a couple years together, said all the right things did all the right things. I bought her a ring, made plans we had our son then 6 am one morning an hour after getting home from my overnight shift she has the police serve me with a restraining order! I had 10 minutes to grab what clothes I could and get out taking me downt he street to a conveineance store to get dumped off like a bag of trash. I lost hunders of hours of video tape of my friends and I goofing off (long before her) family photos of mine, and so on.
I went and contacted the child support enforecement here in Phoenix a week later. I was given the run around for over two years as I treid to get payments started so i wouldn't be labled a dead beat dad. I was told there was nothing they could do because she was not coming after me for payments and my name was not on the birth certificate. That's when I found out she had lied to me about her divorce and all the time it was pending. She had only left her ex husband, not actually filed the papers till sometime after our son was born!
Her ex kept dodging getting served papers about the child support fearing he was introuble for something or another until they finally caught up to him. By this time over 3 years has passed since my son was born. He denied he was the father and once he did the courts came directly after me!!!
Her and I hadn't seen one another since that dreadful morning. As we both sat in the hall waiting to see the judge she flat out admitted she had no intentinos of staying with me and had only used me to get a child because her ex couldn't get her pregnant. She had purposely left me off the birth certificate and gave him her last name and not mine.
I tried to explain this to the judge when we finally got intot he court room but was shut down instantly. I was told I was reckless for not getting payments to her in anyway (mind you she had moved out of state as well with someone else) and for not trying to be a part of my sons life I was ordered to pay 350 a month plus an additional 100 to back support payments. They started me off at 10,000 dollars in the whole with 10% interest added on at the end of every year. The ONLY thing in my favor was being allowed to claim him every other year.
Now between the two kids I pay 850 a month, well am suppose to be paying that much. I was laid off of work 15 months ago and still can not find work. I've lost my apartment, my wife, my car. If it was not for my aunt I would be living on the streets right now. I get 300+ a week for unemployment but only see 209 of it from child support payments being taken out. I get enough for gas and assisting buying food for my aunt and I. I drive illegally int he beater car I have now because I can not afford to get car insurance and get it registered. I've recently lost my life insurance because I couldn't afford the payments anymore.
Is there nothing that can be done? my credit is ruined because I can't make pamynets anymore. My credit cards have all been closed out by the banks, I've close to 40,000 in the negative with bills and support payments. I tried my damndest to get payments started so long ago, whenver I changed an employer or a home address I notified the child support office immediately. Why does it seem to be deemed so needed to treat fathers like we are pieces of scum and be punished for being a parent or trying to be a parent? I haven't even been allowed to see my son since he was 6 months old. He's 14 now!