Insanity!!!!

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Insanity!!!!

by A Broken System
(NYC)

1. If you are in arrears and have a current agreement with the child support agency where you are paying on those arrears and are up-to-date, why would they garnish your tax return in addition to your current agreement? Are they a Family agency or the Mafia?

2. If you are a "non-custodial" parent who pays child support on a monthly basis, current in your payments and have a steady work history...why are you not allowed to claim your child on your tax returns at least every other year? Are you not worthy to do so?

The current child support laws...speaking of my city (NY) are INSANE!!!!

The way they are structured creates and imbalance between the custodial and non-custodial parent and provides an unbelievable amount of power to the custodial parent which in many cases is a power that has been greatly abused. There's no filter system that separates the so-called "dead beat dad" from the hard-working father who is trying to live a normal life. Everyone is basically thrown into a pot and treated with the same disrespect and dishonor.

It's quite interesting to see the pictures of father and child smiling together that grace the family court walls when that same system creates an environment that makes it nearly impossible to lead that same happy existence the family court claims to promote.

It pains me deeply to hear the horrific stories of the mistreatment suffered by so many good men at the hands of the current child support laws. It's angers me.

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Insanity!!!!

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R U serious is right.
by: Anonymous

I'm with R you serious?. The person that cares for the child 365 days a year should be the one that receives it. The non-custodial parents just don't realize the amount of money spent to raise a child. And I've got one for you. How about when they are a convicted criminal, have a substance abuse issue or a serious enough track record? Sure.Lets just let the kids stay with their parent in the mental hospitals or the jails to be with their parents all because they were good in paying their child support. Ever think that maybe in some cases the custodial parent has a VALID reason in some of these situations to refrain from visitations? I'm all for change as long as it protects the child and their welfare. It's not about what YOU want,it's about whats best for the child. I think the laws should be tougher. The children are the ones that suffer after it is all said and done. The states develop laws that use calculations that are sooo outdated.

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Dead beat dad
by: Anonymous

I am a single mother of a 3 year old boy and have not been with his father since he was 3 months old. Not once have I denied my ex the right to see his son. My son has been going to his dads every sunday night for 3 years now and I am the one taking him over there since my ex doesnt have a car. He sold the car MY MOM bought him and doesnt have a drivers license anyway. He doesnt pay child support and never has. I havent gone to the Child Support Office cuz I thought we could agree on something without getting the courts involved. When my son changed day cares it was a little more expensive than the last, but me and his father agreed he needed to change, but I couldnt afford it alone so he agreed to pay half and he did at first until I found out his girlfriend was pregnant with his 4th child. 2 of which he doesnt get to see. Now that he has a new baby who is exactly 2 years and 2 days younger than my son he still doesnt pay anything yet I still waste my gas and take my son to see his father every sunday. I work full time and go to school part time and my ex just now got a job he was getting unemployment when he got fired from his last job. My son was on the verge of getting kicked out of daycare cuz I was over $1000 behind on tuition but thank God me and the director worked it out where he can stay if I pay more than half of my pay check every 2 weeks. I told my ex that I needed some money to pay for our sons daycare or I was going to put him on child support cuz I cant do it by myself. His response was "Well, I guess your gonna have to put me on child support then huh?" Then he has the nerve to ask me if he can claim our son on his next tax return so he and his girlfriend can get some money to get caught up on bills. I am now in the process of looking for a second job just so I can pay my bills daycare, car insurance, cell phone and gas to get back and fourth to work every day. I dont even have rent or utilities cuz I cant afford to move out of my parents house. Im so sorry to all the fathers out there who actually provide for their kids and the moms wont let you see them. Its only hurting the kids in the long run. I always say the problems between the mothers and fathers have nothing to do with the kids so leave them out of it and dont use them as bait to get back at the other person cuz it only hurts the child in the long run. That is why my son will still see his father as long as he wants to I just wish his father wasnt a DEAD BEAT DAD. And yes I think this would be a perfect example of a dead beat. Dont you? By the way, I am in the process of getting him on child support. I dont receive anything from the government except medical insurance for my son and grants to pay for my school.

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Child Support Makes Hitler Look Tame
by: Anonymous

I believe child support or the fear of the child support agency lead to a lot of parental rights terminations. These people make Hitler look like a kitten. To them everyone is a deadbeat, perhaps the death penalty is in order... In our state enforcement is selective, you buck the system they will come get you. Make child support tax deductible to the payer and as income for the payee and you will find lots less arrearages. Hopefully with most of the states having budget problems there will be cuts in these bureaucratic agencies and they will take to reasonable enforcement of only the worst offenders. Our state has 2 different enforcement standards one for women who pay child support and one for men who pay child support. A woman can be in arrears for an amount 5-6 times higher than a man before they take action. So it certainly appears that only the children of female custodial parents need to be supported. I think if everyone is totally honest nobody really wants to pay child support however if that support is used properly nobody really minds paying it when it is used properly and truly in support of the children.
The person below how mentined the father seeing the kids on weekends etc. and only having them part time, whose choice was that? There are many non custodial parents who would be happy to have custody but the courts decided otherwise, then they have to live with not having their children full time and have to pay for that. Tell the custodial parent she will no longer receive child support and see how fast some of those kids get given to the non custodial parent.

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Right To Life
by: Anonymous

The present child support law is unconstitutional and regarding due process of the law and cruel and unusual punishment for non custodial fathers who are alread living in poverty. To destroy a mans credit, take his license, and levy 50 percent of his wages in criminal. These things are being done to fathers whom many of them have been faithful and responsible in relationships only to find out their mate is using them and cheating on them. Then they turn around and use the court to make the man pay for their unwillingness to be responsible and do what is best for the child. They have many men over their child, they do drugs, they surround themselves with drug dealers and drug users and if you say anything you become the abusive controlling father yet we have to pay for this lifestyle via the courts even though we were never married.This is criminal when in the name of the best interest of the child a good man is denied the right to life by moving on and having a family with someone who is loving and responsible. In the majority of the cases the court never assess the actual income of the mother. These women have four and five lovers providing for them, some of them are working and receiving income from their live in lovers, yet the burden is placed on the absent parent who is denied the right to life. And when you try to get your child it is always a painful battle. These women could care less about the child. They only see the child as a means of income. This is criminal exploitation of children and the courts are supporting this. Anyone know that a child benefits more from the time spent with a parent. Yet these women intentionally hold these children as ransom. This should be a crime. Especially with black boys being raised to hate their fathers by these black women who use them as a weapon to the childs ultimate distruction. This is criminal. If a child spends time with their father then thier best interest is and would be served, creating harship for the father is not the solution to developing a healthy child. This system is destroying children and their family's. This system support the intentional pregnancy by women who see child support as a viable and lucrative income even at the level of poverty. The idea that a man should be responsible for a women who make a conscious decision to be promiscuous in a relationship, who conciously chooses not to adhere to family values that are conducive to rearing a healthy child, a women who chooses to be single so that she can sleep around while the non custodial parent bears the burden is unconstitutional. We need a right to life law for all the fathers who try to do the right thing by their children you who are exploited by these gold diggers many of whom work in the very court systems that make the laws.

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The System is just plain WRONG
by: Anonymous

A family member had to pay spousal support to a woman who was living with another man and pregnant with his child. Now he is in arrears on child support and because he had a joint account with one of his siblings the state put a levy on the joint bank account. The amount of support he had to pay was was over 33% of his income, with one child. The total amount of arrears was around $1,100. There is no consistency or any logic in the child support laws. While a friend of mine has an ex who is over $2,000 in arrears and they are doing nothing to enforce that. She had to apply for food stamps to help keep her family going. She works part time and is trying to better herself by going to college. This child support agency is composed of a bunch of ego-maniacs, if you dont agree with their methods YOU WILL PAY. Even after trying to reach an agreement they still rejected it and are pursuing it in court. All of those taxpayer $$$$ wasted because the child support agency wants to win...

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what kind of game this is!
by: Anonymous

What about! my son had a kid in one of his casual sex experinces; he just found out through DNA test after 2 years. Now she is getting child support, she is living with a boyfriend who does not work and the child is living in another city with her moternal grandmother. My son does not care for the baby, or her mom, do not want to waist energy with the system, just don't want to go to jail...

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This makes no sense
by: Anonymous

First off, I'm a divorced mother of 4 and I'm with the men on this child support thing. Everybody's talking about how the "custodial" parent (normally mom) has to do this and that for the kids, but thats all part of being mom. Women complain about rent, food, and other bills, but you are going to have those same bills whether you have a child or not. Saying "oh its more cuz the child is there" I mean come on, how much electricity can a 2 year old burn...lol. Thats insane! Both parents have to live and pay their own bills, etc., so why cant you both just buy the things a child needs. If you give the men a chance to do something instead of running to court for bs things would run so much smoother. The only time I think child support should be "enforced" is if the father doesnt make an effort to do anything. Honestly, I dont think you should receive child support unless the parents were married anyway. That would stop alot of these females having babies thinking its going to keep a man and getting mad when he leaves.

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child support laws are unfair..
by: Anonymous

I have to say it depends on certain criteria but a father who is working and paying a substantial amount of his paycheck should be able to claim the child every other year...and before anyone goes off I am a divorced working mother of three. There are lots of criteria that don't get taken into account. For the custodial parent they think they are not getting enough because they have , rent, utilities, groceries, car payments and a child to support.
(Daycare should be taken into account if the custodial parent is paying it, but not if they are getting it subsidized by the government.)
Well the non custodial parent has the same bills but they don't count because the child is only there every other weekend...they still have to have a place for the child to come to and food for them.

Even if a non custodial parent claims the child the custodial parent gets the head of household, the earned income, the day care deduction, they are not losing anything but an exemption and a child tax credit

It would just do everyone justice if they would consider child support as....how much extra a month that child really cost....if you took the child from the home for a month.....how much your expenses goes down is what that child costs...divide it in half and get over it.

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are u serious?
by: Anonymous

To think a non costodial parent should be given the right to claim a child on tax returns is obsurd. Even though you pay your child support every month and on time most of the financially responsibility falls on the custodial parent. we (custodial parents) care for and support our children 24hrs a day, 7 days a week, all year round while the other parents see their child every other weekend and on alternating holidays and two months in the summer, that hardly gives you guys the right to claim them as a dependant especially when most of us are just getting a small percentage of what you make and a 100% of our earning go towards our kids and household. think about that and how INSANE that is.

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I like this message! But, you're blinded by men paying child support!
by: notperfectyet lol

Haaa, Men? Paying Child Support, how about Women Paying Child Support!!! I am a woman and it REALLY 'PAINS' me!!! lol.......because I am the 'non-custodial' parent and my exhusband thinks 'he's in 'control' and 'calling the shots' - regarding claiming'! I wouldn't DARE claim my kids because that would be just another 'log on the fire' regarding the courts/child support enforcement! I haven't given up, but there's only so much I will tolerate and deal with, at one time since I will be 50 years old this year! I am behind because I helped my mom and dad out when my mom had a hysterectomy and started having
chemo treatments/radiation/pain management/'ER'4trips!/hospital/ICU then passed away! I lowered my 98 hours to help out......why soooo many hours?! Car note, insurance, gas, cell phone, child support......I don't 'own a house' because I don't have enough hours! If the economy gets any worse, one of my paychecks will go straight to putting only gas in the car! Well, who's the perfect parent?! While parents that are divorced try to 'out do' the other one as to who's the 'better parent' the child end up suffering for that type of battle between their parents! I could run a 'carnival' and drum up money to help pay for my back arrears, but is it worth it?! My dad is willing to help me out by contributing 1,000.00 to me to help the courts see that I am trying somehow and avoid jail time! haaaa this whole thing is 'SO RIDICULOUS! Government trying to make a bit off of taxpayers is what the 'arrears' is set up to do just like the 'methadone' clinics who are funded by the Government! If Goldilocks really existed would she have had it 'just right' in this society?! I DON'T THINK SO! LOL

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