Men need a hand - LETS DO SOMETHING!!
(Wyoming - kids in UT)
Great daddy - he misses his baby!!
My husband is going though a similar situation with his exes. Last year he was unemployed due to a knee injury and surgery. He has not been able to find a job since he has healed. We have 3 children living with us, one of which is disabled. I am the only one working at the moment and it is difficult if not impossible to make ends meet at times. He tried to get a review done. He was told that being unemployed the support amount will stay at what it was when he was last employed, regardless of his financial situation. He even got a letter in the mail that said weather He is unemployed or not it is his responsibility to come up with $1000 a month in child support or there will be further legal action. We also tried to get them to take into account the children that we have living with us and got a letter in the mail asking how much money I make.
We did not fill that out because a friend of ours (who has been through all of this before) said that he did the same thing to try and get it lowered for his kids. He ended up having to pay almost twice as much. Because they don?t lower the amount if you are unemployed, but if they know there is any other income in the house they will make it go up substantially. We cant afford what they are asking now, There is no way we could pay more. I find it highly unjust. He is more than willing to take care of my children and he understands the need for child support. He is a very loving and responsible father. It is unfair that the child support office feels that the children who are not living with us are so much more important than the ones that do. And what?s worse is he has not seen any of his kids for about 2 years now.
The youngest he has not even met because she took off when she was pregnant. He only found out because child support called him saying they were going to take more money. And the mother outright refuses to let him see them, ever. We are on the verge of becoming homeless, the only way we make it is from my working, and when he asks for help all they want to do is take more and more away from us. I do see a reason to pay for the children it is his responsibility. However, the children that live with us are MORE of a responsibility. We have to do everything for them, and the ones that live with their mothers have a support to fall back on them The mother of my kids lives with her mother and does not pay rent or utilities or anything. She has a cell phone payment and that is it. Her mother even pays her car insurance (I know this because they lived together at her mothers).
He spoke to the worker on the phone to ask her what we could do about this situation. And all he got is called a deadbeat dad. Now that is cruel and completely out of line. He is a wonderful father and he trys with all of his might. Also- We are not the only people in this country **especially with the current economy** who has fallen on hard times. But none of that seems to matter. He was (in not so many words) told that it is ok if he and the children in our current home go live on the street and eat out of garbage cans, so long as ORS gets THEIR money. How is that even legal? I don?t personally understand any of this and have lost almost any will to try.
Why should he go out and try to better his life when no matter what he does ORS will be there pushing him down and taking away everything we ever try to earn in this life. We have no help, no one to turn to, and no way out. We are stuck paying money we don?t have and trying to find a way to explain to our children that we have to go live on the street because daddy?s other kids are more important than they are.
My husband and I talked about it for a long time and we want to get something together. I am sure that with enough effort we could find at least 1,000,000 men who have gone through similar situations. We want to form some sort of union on this and get the laws changed. We will take it to Washington, organize marches, create petitions to be signed, ect? It can be done, we just need to seek out anyone who is willing. I know it will not be a fast situation, but nothing worthwhile is ever easy. Please let me know if you are interested in helping out our cause. Also- Please forward this to anyone you know that would be willing to support the cause.
Thank you so much for your support!!