Mr. Sarver

by Benjamin E. Sarver
(jacksonville FL.)

Since all of my letters to the Duval and Clay County Courts have gone unnoticed and unanswered, I am writing to you in hopes that you and the media as a whole will be made aware of how Fathers are treated because of the unfortunate Child Support System.

Each time I am forced into the court room I am not allowed to speak. The one time I was asked a question my heartfelt, truthful answer was turned into a joke. The laughter by even the court officials was not only humiliating but my response was absolutely not considered. My question was this: How could I possibly owe $50,000.00 when my children (and their mother) lived in my home for more than ten years.

My request was to have an accurate calculation of the arrearages because all of those years I was still being wrongfully charged Child Support without my knowledge. What procedure or documentation is required for me to follow in order to rectify this issue (without paying an attorney which I cannot afford)? How could this be misconstrued as a joke? Why is this not taken into consideration?

I raised my kids, they are good, well mannered, good students and athletes. They, the court have no idea what I have done for my children neither are they willing to listen. Why do they always assume that all fathers are deadbeat dads? Why am I not given credit for the time when my children and their mother lived with me in my home when I was totally financially responsible for my entire family? My oldest son lived with me, not his mother during a time that I was still paying Child Support payments. Now it seems that I am still charged with paying for a lie to the tune of $50,000.00, and no one is even listening to reason.

Although I have worked since I was sixteen years old, I have never gotten a check with my name on it from state or any government. I have no drivers license...They have been suspended without any investigation. I have received checks from employers for zero dollars.

I have been locked up so many times I have literally lost count, a few times because of miss placed paper work. The payments were made but not calculated until after the warrant was issued. So I was later released upon showing my check stub but lost a job, because of the system, now not able to pay at all. At one time I worked two jobs that I walked to everyday for miles in the heat of summer to get a check for zero dollars,
My entire body from my head to my toes broke out in a rash several times over heated (ended up in ER, fired cause no one will allow me to cook in their kitchen with that all over my body
The whole system is set up for fathers to fail, all those jobs generated, for child support and nothing makes sense.

While my son lived with me I had to pay Child Support to his mother for him. Although I reported it to them (via letter and repeated phone calls it was not discontinued or even considered. While he was living with me he was a straight "A" student. I had to go to counseling, probation, teen court, and all these places with him. It was so important to him that I took a chance all the time driving on a suspended license no insurance. He had to be there and no-one else could take him. All the months I did this not one time was his mother there. My oldest daughter got sick and I spent 7 days by her side. I never even left the hospital, not her mother, I did this.

My whole check then went into child support. There was absolutely no money left for me to live. No one knows about the countless jobs i have lost, because of child support inaccurate system. All the letters, coupons threats to suspend my already suspended license, the state could probably save millions on paper alone. IS TIME with these kids worth anything??? BAD credit, Jail, Garnished wages only the MEN and children get hurt, money, money, money.

Actually this system ruins families, these teen age boys and girls out here goin crazy, this system makes it very hard for a father to even be involved in his child’s life. Nothing else matters. None of the things fathers do count for anything. Do me a favor go to the
foodstamp/welfare office, sit outside and watch
you will see WOMEN, Nails done, hair done dressed nice high dollar, new cars only the best.

Just for your information these are some of the reasons for the crime, broken homes, gangs and drug related violence, child detention centers, probation, and teen pregnancies in Duval, Clay County and around the entire United States of America. You google: Fatherlessness for yourself and do the math, you will be better able to understand the reason for this letter. Fathers all over the United States are dealing with this issue. Some times we swap Child Support horror stories but in the end, I am not a deadbeat dad and I am still not willing to pay the system any money that I do not owe, not fifty thousand dollars!! I dont even have a Drivers License to get to work to make money....

Trey's Thougths: It does seem like the system favors the mother more than the father. I a system out of control and powerful, what are we to do?

If you have any legal questions on child support laws or any thing related, there is a box below where you can type in your question and a certified lawyer will be able to assist you. Please leave your question in the box below and a professional lawyer will get back to you.

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Ms. C
by: Anonymous

Contact legal aide if you haven't already. My husband and I are both divorced. We both have children from previous marriages. We deal daily with the bullshit that you describe. It is the stupidest crap. What ever happened to freedom? Goodluck we will pray for you

by: former single mom

im not sure what else you can do except hire a lawyer (its worth 3k it if it saves you 50k). I also wanted to let you know that if you kids mom was still receiving welfare or any other government aid while she was living with you(whether u knew it or not) then you would still have to pay that back in the form of child support arrears. is your child grown? maybe they would be willing to go to court to support your evidence that they lived with you for so long. good luck. if your willing to I would like you to update me with a new post/comment.

by: Anonymous

If you have gotten so many letters, why did you not get any telling you that you needed to pay child support? It did not just ad up to $50,000 out of the blue. I keep seeing men on here blogging about how the system has done all of these things to them, but my oldest sons dad has seen him twice in the last 6 years-by his(the dads) choice not mine. I have not received child support from him in over a year and it was not on regular basis when he did pay it. But has anything been done to him? NO! He moved to another state-I reported his new address almost a year ago and they are STILL trying to find something out from the other state! Just as many custodial parents are abused by the system as non-custodial parents are. and if you do have an attorney, it sounds like they are not doing a very good job on your behalf.

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