Ms. Kimberly Hazel

by Kimberly Hazel
(Astoria, Oregon, USA)

My boys

My boys

I have been living in the state of Oregon for ten years now. I moved here from Utah to start a new life with my children. I was married to their abusive father for ten years. My problems with child support started when the Utah judge would not sign our uncontested divorce papers because my ex-husband had not attended the mandatory, two-hour parenting class. After I had fired my lawyer (because I could no longer afford him), had filed several “Order to Show Causes” with the Utah courts, and lost the house that rightfully would have gone to me if the divorce had been finalized, the judge finally signed the divorce decree in 1996.

It is now 2008 and last month I received my first child support check ever of $345. My ex-husband owes me around $70,000. The original amount ordered was $571 for two children, but my ex voluntarily returned himself on the warrant and had the amount reduced. He did this because he got a notice from Oregon stating that he only owed $14,000. This was an amount accrued from the time the case was re-opened in this state and I’m sure he wouldn’t have stepped forward if he thought he still owed all of it.
This all sounds good, but now the lady at our Oregon Recovery Services tells me I may be subpoenaed to Utah when the case is tried in Sept. or Oct. Because I live 1,000 miles away the cost of this trip will cost more than all of the support I will have received; provided he pays the next couple of months. I was also told that he may be forgiven for any backed support not paid prior to eight years ago!
I struggled for years as a single mother working nights, etc. in order to support my children. My case has been closed repeatedly because I haven’t been on public assistance and because the state of Utah supposedly couldn’t locate my ex-husband. They finally reopened the case, when I called and insisted, as they were holding him in their own jail!
My children have suffered over the years while their father has been allowed to not pay.
Oregon explains to me that Utah has very lenient laws and that they can’t do much because they are the state with jurisdiction. It seems to me that justice and the law don’t work for the person who is doing the right thing.

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by: Disabled Mom

Your ex can't be "forgiven" his arrears. There are eight major laws on the federal books. You were apparently being lied to to discourage you. His arrearages will only pile up with accompanying yearly judicial interest. Investigate Oregon's state laws on child support and your options in family law, there are plenty of them. Don't get discouraged or give up as the system wishes you to do. I've been at mine for 25+ years and the "sweet reward" that comes in the mail every week is so worth all the blood, sweat and tears. You can request a telephonic court appearance if the trip is over 100 miles I believe, I got one. All you can do is ask. You have fine looking boys there, God bless them and you!

You R Not Alone
by: Lawanda

You are not alone. I lived in Washington State and fought with Texas for years. Now I am owed over 40,000 and he keeps getting away with it. They send him to court and threaten to put him in jail for non-compliance when he returns to court,mind a say every three to four months. Then he pays the day or two before court and they slap his wrist. I live now in Texas and they keep putting off transferring the case to my area because he's over 10 hours away. Does it make sense that the money we spend to go to court to speak on our children's behalf is a waist of gas and needs to go to our children? I keep sending the Attorney general displeasing email's so we will only wait and see. Texas luch for my children is over 80.00 a month and this " loser" has a new truck, new house, and works for himself and his wife works and avoids paying taxes. I feel you and your children's pain. But I have been known for making it happen and now I am married to a wonderful man " a Preacher" and I am praying for you and myself and others and I will be doing the research to see how to change these unresponsive and irresponsible laws that help only the owing parents. Take care and remember you aren't alone.

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