Niece is getting screwed!


(Houston, TX)

I have a 15-year old niece, whose mother receives $97.00 a week from her biological father. However, instead of spending the money on my niece, she uses the money to eat out, buy herself clothes,(while my niece wears jeans with holes in them and shoes that are falling a part), get her hair highlighted and party. My niece lives with her grandparents and has lived with her grandparents for going on two years now. The mother doesn't pay a single dime to the electrical bill, food bill, utilities or anything else that is needed for my niece, yet she still collects the child support.

Oh! Did I mention that the mother doesn't live with my niece? She collects the child support from my niece's grandparent's house, that is meant to take care of my niece, but the mother has pawned my niece off on the grandmother (the mother's mother). The mother is defrauding the State of Texas' Child Support Division of the U.S. Attorney General's Office, and no body seems to give a crap! I've called and reported the mother twice, but nothing has happened. I'm told that the mother is allowed to do with the money what she sees fit to do with the money. That's bull S***! The money is meant to provide food, clothing and whatever other support is needed for my niece, not the mother! The mother just spends the money, she calls HERS, at will, with NO regard as to what my niece needs.

The mother has no money because she has no job. She has no job because she's lazy and unwilling to EARN her keep. She thinks my niece's child support is her paycheck. I think it's horrible that mothers are allowed to take from their kids and not have to answer for what is done with the money the fathers pay to support their children. This mother is up to her eyeballs in debt, yet pays no bills. She moves from one friend's house to the next, while her parents care for her child, but she still collects the child support? How is that legal? If the child is living under the grandparent's roof and is being taken care of by the grandparents, the child support should go to the grandparents, not the mother who is out spreading her legs to ever Tom, Dick & Harry that comes along. The child support should be used to take care of my niece, not take care of the mother so she can look good for the next date she has. The laws need to be more strict on how people are using the child support.

There needs to be consequences for those who misuse and defraud the system. There are too women out there misusing the money that is meant for their children and it's the kids who suffer! I know my niece suffers and no one gives a damn!!!! It's pathetic that a child has no rights because they're a minor. Someone needs to stand up to these parents who abuse the system and put a stop to it! Make these mothers accountable for what they're spending the money on. If the money isn't being spent on the child, they need to be fined and/or jailed. It's as simple as that. Perhaps the children in the State of Texas will be better taken care of.

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back child support
by: Anonymous

i know how you all feel about the support not being used for the kids, i have 3 grandkids that had to work for money to get their tampons, deodorant and all personal things while their mom collected all the child support every month, needless to say the mother and step-father both bought brand new harleys and have new vehicles, my daughter even draws ssi and i have not idea what for, well they had to take and get a dissalution because they were going to take it, but they still live together, she also gets hud so she has what she calls HER INCOME, many of times i have told her that isn't her income that is money for these kids, when i got divorced i received support for my kids but that is what it was used on, the things that they needed, it just agravates me, now i have a granddaughter that is granduating and there is back support owed, i mean many thousands of dollars, i am trying to find out if she is eligible to draw the back support after she moves out
can anyone help me with this, i live in ohio

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Sigh
by: Anonymous

I know how you feel. I have a 2 year old niece that cries almost all the time, and I'm told that I would go to jail for giving her 1 gummy vitamin with inositol, D and a small amount of E in it while she's having sinus as well. I hate the saying: "Mind your own business." Not only is it vague, firm, wild and mean, it's unfair, abusive, killing and more. Not only that, but I'm also told that I will have my dog sent away if I do, that's already over 12 years and the person that's telling me this: we used to agree on everything and be the best sisters. I don't even depend on her around the car. She says that she'll make my dog sing while I'm sleeping then or that she'd feel like killing me. I'll always be the most holistic, passive, prideful, honest, energetic best christian and doctor around, and, as a result, don't mind going to jail for it, except I'll lose my sleep over it all and my heart rate and blood pressure will rise to about 200, and they won't be sorry then either. This is the first time my sister's been home that she's been worse off than my mom, even in knowledge, and she's had over 8 or even 18 years of college and my mom has had none. Mom gave her a cheeseburger simply because she didn't know what else to give her. How false could that be?!!!!!!!!!! From Mcdonald's!!!!! My sister still hasn't decided to never come here again and she's almost 6 years older than me. I do have troubles with my mom, yet nothing this bad. A 2 year old that cries all the time and dis-obeys her mom, repeating things, then crying cause I'm sad or un-interesting in being around much? It's my sister's fault and she doesn't know it. She healed up right after I gave it to her as well and slept so well that night, I want to do it again. We were having fun in my room as she said: medicine!! Have one!! I know how to train a dog well. Helping that way is the only way she obeys or learns. My sister still hasn't thanked me for sharing, helping or anything there, that I'm not going to share my tea with her.

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I know how you feel
by: Anonymous

My husband has a 12yr old son who lives with his mother. She has 7 kids total...My husband has payed child support since the day they separated. we also have insurance on my step-son..health, dental, vision. The mom gets foodstamps & medicaid on the kids. One day she called & said she had to sign his name on a paper to let them know how much child support he gives her. We reported it but nothing happened. She throws a fit if we don't give her child support early. She always uses the excuse that her lights are gonna get cut off. Yet she has money to go clubbing, always has make-up & dresses inappropiately at times. every 6 months to 1 or yrs, she's swapping men. bouncing the kids. my step-son fell on a tree branch and scraped his face. when we went to pick him up, is when his mom said he fell on the branch.Two weeks later he has a bruise on his cheek, and it looked like he had an infected pimple on his face. My step-son said that the bruise was left from were the scab was. When I went to clean the infected pimple, it wasn't a pimple after all, it was a small piece of the branch that stayed in his face. Come on now, if you LOVE yor child, wouldn't you notice this. He wears clothes that's either too tight for him or raggedy hand me downs. She bought him a pair of shoes that were the same brand, but two different style shoes. The kids at school made fun of him & called him trailor trash. I carry ins on him threw my job, I go out of my way to take him to a school dance or see him during programs & ceremonies. We buy his school clothes, school supplies, only for it to get taken away & he has to share the clothes with his siblings because they are not fortunate to get this. I treat him as if he was my own. He told me he was very happy & lucky to have me as a step-mother. I understand what you are going through. Hopefully soon we can have a system that actually works..

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i use my son's child support for bills and other stuff as well
by: Anonymous

I will admit, that I am one of those mothers who take my sons child support payments and pay my bills.

I usually use some for the rent that puts a roof over his head, for the power and water that keeps him warm and bathes him, for the auto that provides his transportation to school or to appointments, or maybe even for MY bills that went behind BECAUSE HIS CHILD SUPPORT WASN'T ENOUGH to get him his school supplies and uniforms so I had to use more of my money after paying the other portion of the rent, power, water, auto, etc.

Men who don't want to pay child support should either keep his dick in his pants or get a darn vasectomy....you might find that it was cheaper in the long run.

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TEXAS LAWS SUCK
by: Anonymous

You are so correct TEXAS CHILD SUPPORT LAWS SUCK!
The recieving parent can buy drugs/ cigarettes/ alcahol/ anything they want for themselves , while the children wear dirty clothes and old shoes. Nothing of the $ goes towards these children and NO ONE is held liable , except for the payer whom will go to jail if not paid.
HOW SAD.

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spousal support or child support???
by: Anonymous

The money is suppose to be for the kids if there is something the parent needs or wants they should be adult enough to wait. Its not fair when fathers pay for their kids and the mother doesn't work but spends that money on just there selves and it upsets me at the fact that when the father moves on and marries again that both of them have to work and stay away from the kids they have together because he is having to pay for his kid with the other women and the kid is seeing none of the money... I have to work and stay away from my son because of this "child support" and its not fair that she gets to set at home and not work and spend the money on herself

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To a different point of view!
by: Stepmother of 3

You said it... because I may use my child support to buy something for me but then I turn around and use my paycheck to buy items for my children. But my Question is what do you do to support your kids? That is the problem with the whole child support system the NCP's are tired of paying support and people like you spend it on yourself, yes you said you use your paycheck to spend on your children to replace what you spent of the child support on yourself but what do you do YOURSELF to support you kids? That is why all child support should be accounted for and what it is spent on FOR THE CHILD!!!!!

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a different point of veiw!!!
by: Anonymous

Ok let me start by saying in your case yes the mother is wrong and something should be done about it. Now let me get to the other side I have been on welfare and I for one hated to have to do that but they do make you prove that you are spending at least 40 hours a week looking for a job. If you don't turn in that documentation you lose your cash benefits as well as your day care! I also receive child support now and I don't believe a parent should have to prove what they are spending that child support on because I may use my child support to buy something for me but then I turn around and use my paycheck to buy items for my children. either way the same amount is being spent on my children and I can pretty much guarantee that I am spending more than I receive in child support!!!

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Lets actually "HELP" the children
by: Anonymous

I am not suprised at your writing.
I believe this happens a lot everywhere. I don't understand how parents partiularlly mothers can get away with this kind of action. Mothers and maybe some fathers, but it's usually the mothers in most cases cause the Judge's favor the mother, but when a mother gets custody of the child(ren) they see it as an easy way in life, they figure hey I can have my kids, get income from the father for child support my parents or any other family member for that matter can take care of my child(ren) and I won't have to work and I will be able to do what ever I want. I see it a lot, and it is sickening.
Welfare and child support agencies allow this to happen, I think a parent who gets on assitance and collects child support should have to show proof to the welfare agency that the parent has been actually out trying to get a job just like what u have to do when you try to get unemployment benefits.
The parent should not be given a free ride that is why we have the economic crisis that we do cause there are to many people on welfare because it is so easy to get on assistance as long as you are not making over a certain amount your eligible. There are a lot of parent's that see child support as an inome for them selves not to actually HELP the child(ren). and getting free assistance with out harsher guidelines why should they go get a job?
The whole system needs to be looked over and revised. Make it harder for a parent to get assitance.
I also feel that a child should be taken care of equally. They should set up an account that only a specific agency can get into to where the child support is deposited from both parents when it is joint custody that way when the chld is with either parent and if they need some thing they can go to the agency and get the assitance. if only one parent has custody over the child the the non custodial parent would pay into the account then when the cusodial parent needs assitance for something for the child then the agency can go to the account and authorize an amount for what ever the need is and make it payable to the store of where they need to get the things for the child. Not just sending a monthly or weekly check to the custodial parent and assume (cause we all know what assuming does) and if you don't it make an a*s out of both sides, that the parent is using the money properly for the child. It's all Documentation everything needs to have a record. It should not have to be like this but if the government is going to dictate to the people how the child will be cared for and by who then they need to take it all the way and mediate the income and where it goes. Make the parents that use the system incorrectly show proof that they are really havin a hard time getting a job among other things.

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The Great State of Texas!
by: Stepmother of 3

Typical flaw of the system! My Husband is in the same situation! He payes his child support each week of a $193.00 for his oldest son. Now when my Husband an I first got together his son was living with his grandmother in Katy. For 2 yrs my husband payed child support to his ex while the child lived with her mother. Then in 2008 my stepson dicided to move back with his mother little did we know that she had gotten a letter from the AG for a modifcation. Since my stepson moved back home with his mom she called us an asked if we could help her with school clothes. We agreed we would by the school clothes if she would buy the supplies. Well low an behold we held up are end but when we took my stepson back home his grandmother was there visting and she told me she bought the supplies. The modification meeting came right before Christmas, they incresed his child support from $400 a month to $847 a month. The summer of 2009 my stepson asked us if he could live with us my husband talked to his ex about it an she agree. She said after we got him enrolled in school we would talk about the child support situation. So i enrolled him in K12 a home school program. We called her about going in and droping the child support, and she thru a fit she said " Why should I have to suffer because he is living with you". She has no job, an uses the childsupport as her paycheck. So My husband filed a case with the AG over the internet. I emailed the AG for 3 months finally they set up a meeting with my husband an his ex in Nov we went to the meeting but she never showed up, the case worker told him not to get his hopes up because when the mother is faced with losing child support they never show up. The still did the meeting with the ex on the phone she needed to come in and sign the paper work. Well after 2 weeks the paperwork was never signed an she bribed her son with a xbox if he moved back. So he did.
Us tax payers pay for her van, car insurance, she also collects SSI on her other son from another man, that is disabled. She says she can't work because of this, but this child goes to school. Between the Grandmother an us we proved clothes etc. for him, while the mother does God knows what with the CS money. The best advise I can give you is to have the father file a case on the internet so the check is made out to the Grand Parents an keep on them. But just like us good luck on having the mother show up for the meeting to change the child support over to the grandparents.

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CPS
by: Anonymous

Your best bet is to report the child is not being taken care of and left with friend and grandmother to Child protectiver services. You might get a better response.

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