non-custodial father

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non-custodial father

by Mark Byberg
(redford,michigan)

My ex-wife and I separated in september of 2004.Actually she decided she did not want to be married any more any left our home in Georgia (her parents came and got her and the boys and took them back to Michigan). In march 2005 I started paying child support (it was taken out of my check every 2 weeks from work)and this has been going on for the last 5 years.About twice a year I would get letters from the michigan friend of the court stating I was behind on my child support and I had to send them statements from work showing the payments were taken out of my check.Now in 2010 they did a review of my support and now they want to take another 250.00 out of each check because (1)I do not see the boys at all because I was constantly fighting with my ex-wife and her parents and I felt it would be best for the boys if I stepped out of the picture and (2)I guess the state thought she was not getting enough support ( I have been at my same job for 16 years and the ex had 4 jobs in the 5 years we were married). I can not afford a lawyer because I do not have the money and not only do I pay the support but I also have the boys covered under my insurance since they were born.I don't know if the system is this messed up or they just have to keep going after the one's that are paying every month.I can't stop working because they would put me in jail for not paying supportbut they are killing me ( I have thought about suicide but they would still find a way to get the money). Thanks for listening.

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non-custodial father

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Nov 16, 2011
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the system just plain sucks
by: Anonymous

I am mad! I have been betrayed by my wife, her family, and the state. No common sense is applyed at all to anything.

Nov 01, 2011
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I hear you loud and clear
by: Anonymous

I absolutely understand every minute wher eyou coming from. My son has gone thru the same stuff. one of his probs is he can not have visitation with his children because when he tries he is drilled for every detail of his life. to a point that he just gets really depressed about it and moves off and away. because what she does with the info is pure harrassment. I really feel for you guys, I do. I have a son and a daughter so i deal with both sides of the coin. sorta speak. I do believe in men taking care of their kids and being a part of their life and insuring that the children have what htey need. but every family takes two incomes. and I just don't understand why it is just focused on the man. I think it also pretty sad, if a man only makes x amount of money why are these women treating them like they are millionaires. and takling every dime they can possibly get. my son's first daughters mother, now has so much interest in his other childrens mothers. why? it is simply to gang up on him. well if you see or here from him call me and i do i will call you.. he wants so much to be part of his youngest daughters life. do they not know what they are doing? using the children first of all. because if he can not have visitation with the children with out defamation of character and slander. he will just stop being involved and that is the next thing they are trying to do. now they can hollar dead , and disersion. and that way they can goto the judge and get what ever they want. but i think i have proof of what is going on. and maybe something else can be done. to them....maybe with the right judge or attorney and yes most of you guys can not afford an attorney. and if you work extra and put back what is taking from your income for child support, they want a part od that as well. i understand completely. but somehow you guys are going to have to get alittle smarter..don't settle for anyone because you are lonely. use protection. and watch something about Mary. you get what I am saying. but, for the ones that are already in this situation.will have to work towards a diifernt solution. mayb together and have a meeting with other dads. get you a foundation going somehow as to being the best dads foundation or something, make it grow. learn as much as you can and who know you may get an attorney involved. I don't know all the answers but worth a try. you guys are smart think about it. you should be able to get your child support lowered some how if you are willing to be a part of the childrens life. even if it has to be by phone alone. i do know what you go thru. i could talk all night and forever about this. if you have it. share it with you babies if not then golly get it changed some how. talk to someone. don't just take in your own hands..good luck. and i certainly hope the best. and i am hoping the best for mine as well. take care..

Oct 09, 2010
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Tell me about it
by: Anonymous

I did the same, and was removed from custody because of non payment of child support. The money was coming out of my military pay check (and of course, I was broke). Couldn't fight her because I had no money and her family was wealthy and in her state. 15 years later, my children want nothing to do with me and I can't put her in prison for perjury. Sometimes it sucks to be a man. Vert sorry - I feel your pain.

Jun 04, 2010
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Their has to be a way to take care of this
by: Anonymous

Start writing or emailing your congressmen and any repersentive you can to get some help. When that does not help. Live in a one room and save up enough to get a lawyer. But do your homework on Lawyers they are not all equal. I really feel for you but I am in the same sitution only worse. But good luck . Texas Bexar county isn't any better.

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non-custodial father

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