Randy Clark

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Randy Clark

by Randy
(Bedford, TX)

My wife and I divorced ten years ago. Our daughter is now 17. She (my wife) moved to Washington State ten years ago with my daughter. She is living with a man, whom she met, ten years ago. Hope you're doing the math. Anyway, I have paid via direct deposit on my child support, and sent extra when asked for special things, carried medical, vision and dental insurance, and gotten reimbersments for my ex when she had to pay out of pocket for a medical issue.
I was supposed to get my daughter for a month every summer and rotate every other Easter and Christmas. But the longest I've gotten her was for 3 weeks the first year, and then, because of "summer programs", I've only been given one to two weeks.
I've never received any video or photos of my daughters events, so I've missed out on all of that.
All I ever get called about is money issues. I call every weekend and leave messages, just to check up and see how things are. No response.
People suck. The laws should demand participatory guides for both parents to be obligated to as well as the financial aspect. You can always get more money. But life - that passes and it's gone.

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Randy Clark

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Mar 03, 2010
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non custiodial mother- same problem
by: Anonymous

I am a non-custodial mom paying child support and understand your situation!!! My ex disobeyed every court order that was put in place. Moved my children w/o telling me or notifing the CSDC.My children are older now. Youngest is 17 boy and oldest 19 boy. Oldest has been hospitilized and put in jail/probation and I was never told until I had to snoop around. My youngest...put on probation. Both into drugs, and droped out of high school to get GED. They were old enough when we divorced to pick who they wanted to live with and of course they knew he would let them do what ever they wanted...and look what that got them. My ex refuses to keep me updated about anything. It is so frustrating~~!!!!! Hope it gets better for you...but baby dont hold your breath...I am not!!:-)

Jul 20, 2009
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I agree
by: Anonymous

I am a mom who is paying child support. My ex took custody of my children while i was in the army fighting in Iraq. He claimed he didn't know where i was, but the army was still sending him his money every month, I was served papers in Iraq (which got to me 2 months AFTER the court hearing). So, now I am paying child support and he doesn't let me see or even talk to them. I have to research him and i finally find a phone number and call him and he changes his number. He tells my children i don't want them and I don't try to come around and that is just so not true. The courts refuse to do anything. I am on disability and am not making enough to survive myself and pay the amount the courts tell me to pay. He has many many girlfriends and everytime he gets one pregnant i have to pay more support for my children. the court says its to make sure my kids have what they need since he has to take care of another child. I don't mind paying for my kids, but I'm with you Randy.. they should make it a law that the custodial parents have to go by the same court orders we do, i mean if we don't pay we can go to jail, but when they don't hold up their end we have to pay to take them to court and hope someone will listen!

Apr 14, 2009
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To Dead Beat Anonymous
by: Randy Clark

Your bitterness is getting in the way of wisdom. If you read more carefully, I never said that my responsibility ceases or should cease because my ex lives with (or marries) another. The point isn't about my monitary responsibility. It is the non responsiveness of my ex to promote and encourage relational contact between my daughter and I. The only contact she provides is when she needs financial assistance. There is no effort to include me in my daughter's sporting events or music, or other activities. She lives 1500 miles away. And like the blind person who rebutted my original remarks, it would be nice to have laws passed to make the inclusion of such things mandatory - perhaps then we can call persons such as yourself who are only interested in the monitary side of relationship to the term they so deserve - "Dead Beat Mom"

Apr 13, 2009
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dead beats
by: Anonymous

my ex is a dead beat he never pays anything doesnt call NOTHING in response to the previous poster just because someone lives with someone does not mean that support should cease y let the absent parent off that easy how is it fair that someone else whos not the biological parent takes full physical and financial responsibility while the so called biological parent is on easy street..taking no physical or financial responsibility for his children..

Apr 12, 2009
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FATHER
by: MARK

You're right I'm in the same situation. Now she wants more money and the court is going to give it to her unless I can return to Ohio after a 12hour drive and missing work,just to fight this. I'm not deadbeat dad. The states should pass a law if you live with someone or get remarried then support should cease. Why help the other man out too. And the kids never see the money and in some cases such as my kids do without clothes ect. and still call me for money. come on people help the fathers that do try their best and still lose everything due to child support. Who do we contact to protest this?

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Randy Clark

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