When I was in high school I got my girlfriend pregnant. We had our oldest son and we lived together off and on for a year then we had a second child. We were still not married. We split up and never got back together. I didn't know she had gone and filed child support on me when our first son was born. At the time I was supporting her and my son. When we split up finally, I would give her money out of my check to help with the boys. Then I got in trouble with the law, went to jail for a year then I was out and child support started again for 6 years. I moved out of town for a better job and they hit me with a ton of child support. They were garnishing my wages even when I never went to court. No luck! When they had turned 18, they went to get their driver license and found out that on the birth certificate the father is unknown. The boys don't even have my last name legally. Now they're in there 20's and I am still trying to pay off the back child support. There's nothing I can do.
First let me say that my son is 16 yrs old and I have paid child support from day 1. When he was 14 my ex-girlfriend sued me for more child support, I thought it was time to establish parental rights to my son as I had been denied visitation frequently over the years. We went to mediation and had a joint parenting plan that we agreed to, signed and had the judge sign also. All went well with the plan until 2 weeks ago. My son was to spend the second 4 1/2 weeks of summer vacation with me. My ex planned a week at the beach, not only during my time with my son but also on my vacation week that I had already made plans for. My son of course wanted to go to the beach. He refused to come over and my ex threatened to have me arrested if I came onto her property. I called the family law master and was told to file a contempt of court judgment against her. I went to the courthouse paid the fee and filed the papers. Four days later the family law master called me to tell me that they were sending us back to mediation. And to add insult to injury I have to pay 50% of the meeting. Although I didn't break the agreement I have been punished severely. The courts are only for women, they don't' care about the men. My son is 16 and now he doesn't want me in his life because his mother lets him do whatever he wants. We were all that age at one time. What 16 yr old makes good decisions?
I'm married with 3 children; I made a mistake cheating on my wife; I had another child; I asked the girl to get an abortion, she said no; she had the baby and I ended up paying child support for the girl. I once paid $69.00 a week now she brought me back to court to have my child support increased to $90.00 because she no longer works. Now she has 3 different baby fathers, and she does not let me see my daughter. She is now 14 years old and my wife who I have been with for 20 years no longer works due to an illness. I have a mortgage, car notes and three children at home; I can't afford the extra $21.00 a week. I pay for all my kids medical and dental. What can I do?
It amazes me how screwed up the system is. I have two states fighting over the same child support payment. Neither state is willing to give in and I have been punished because I cannot make "double" payments. I have lost my job, my house, my vehicle, and my health because of this situation. There is not one single attorney that will take this on and the only one I did manage to find wanted more money than is in physical circulation. I have been refused any modifications and visitation. Phone calls go unanswered and messages go unreturned. Everyone claims that is another department's problem. Justice for a father willing to make support payments is not a reality. Reality, is them stripping you of your ways and means to work, suggesting something "illegal" in order to make their precious income on time, and divesting you of your pride and abilities to make your payments.
I am fighting some major health issues at the moment and not able to work. I don't need the stress of this on top of it all. The states involved could care less about my health, they just want a check. I am hoping to live long enough to see this to the end and have it all sorted out. I'm not holding my breath for either one. I'd love nothing more than to be at work right now, feeling productive and alive.
I've been told that I can forget about any disability benefits, retirement benefits, or SSI. That money belongs to them. Justice is for the rich and well-to-do. I suppose that's why I'm here.