TO: Not a "welfare" case
You are very snide in your remarks saying that those who disagreed with you must be deadbeat dads. What is your "overly educated" definition of a "deadbeat dad"? This term is far too overused by the custodial parent! I, too, am an educated woman, albeit, not so high on the corporate ladder as you, but I was a single mother from the time that my daughter was in kindergarten, until the time she was in the 8th grade. I am now married to a man who is called a "deadbeat dad" from those of you who have no idea what you're talking about. My daughter's father was not the best at paying child support, but he visited her regularly and paid what he could when he could.
He bought her school supplies, winter coats and shoes, nice Christmas gifts and attended everything she was involved in in school. I desperately needed the money for support, but because of his love and involvement with her, and because he made sure he bought the things she needed, I didn't complain. I didn't feel the need for her to be "wealthy" with money, but wealthy with both of our love. There was no particular "lifestyle" she was entitled to, any more than anyone else, other than LOVE! She and I had a quote on our fridge while she was growing up..."If you want to feel rich, count all the things you have that money can't buy." We were rich, in many ways, but not by raping her father.
On the other hand, my now husband is facing criminal charges from the state of Texas for non-support. Did I mention that both his kids are parents themselves now? And that his kids left home at ages 15 and 16 (NOT 18). And that their mother would not allow visitation once he began dating after their divorce? Did I mention that he paid child support for a while after the visitation ceased? There were only about 3 years which he did not pay. His ex reported the arrearages at $16,000 (which was not accurate because the kids had left home before they were 18, but hey, who's counting?) He had been in contact with his kids, who came to visit him in NC in about 1999. Oh! This made the ex mad, this is when she filed for back support. She knew where he was, but a warrant was not served on him until 2003! He went to TX and turned himself in. By then, the alleged $16,000 with penalty and interest had turned into, get this....$40,000! BUT, there ws no way to fight her lies and the AG there, so what it came down to is that my husband (who, by the way is a great guy loved by everyone who knows him)is now a "convicted felon".
He's been paying the arrearages since then to the tune of $300/month, all of our tax refunds (READ MY TAX REFUNDS, TOO-although I file as an injured spouse), and even our stimulus checks have gone toward the balance since 2003! Guess what, he has been out of work due to injuries for the past several months and couldn't pay anything, so they come and arrest him again, saying he owes child support in the amount of...here we go again...$40,000! WHERE DID THE MONEY GO HE HAD PAID FOR THE PAST 6 YEARS? We can't fight it, we've tried. We even had a family member offering to put up their house to offer her a cash settlement of $10,000 the first time and $20,000 the next! SHE REFUSED the money saying she didn't need it, but wanted to watch him squirm. When his attorney called her to offer the $10,000 she reported the attorney for harassment. This woman is evil indeed. And she is a liar and knows it in her heart. But, we can sleep at night knowing we are honest and telling the truth, and pray she tosses and turns and feels a conscience, if she has one. We will do whatever we have to do, whatever is required by law, but we can never beat the Texas AG, no sir! The AG can't be approached, and no amount of proof is enough to make them realize they are wrong. Fight them all you want, but you can't win. Only God can deal with the exes and the AG, but their time will come to stand in judgement, and they will get theirs then!